Life as I know it

I deal with life just like anyone else does, just that I don't take it too seriously. I am not perfect, but I choose to believe I am not imperfect. This coming from someone who has spent a good part of his life trying to come to terms with failures, makes a little sense. But then, as I said I am not perfect. Nor is anyone around me. I am proud, an egoist of sorts and I have absolutely no qualms in accepting that. I love life for what it does to me. I have failed often but that has never stopped me from committing the next mistake and fail again. I still move on. 


Moving on simply comes from acceptance. I accept things for what they are. But acceptance by no means implies giving up. Acceptance for me is a form of denial, which is temporary and acceptable for a while. It is just that instead of thinking what it should have been, and then re-thinking what it should have been, it is easier and advisable to accept what exists. Rather than expressing resistance to situations, accepting them helps me think.

"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most importantly, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” - Steve Jobs


Thinking is good. Overdoing, is not. Happens all the more when things aren't going the way we want. The "why me" question pops too frequently. Perspective of life is what needs to be changed over time. Just remember that every problem is temporary. This is definitely not the first and this most definitely is not the last of the ones that you would come across. You got over your problems once and you can do it again and again.  So come what may, it is good to get over obsessive thinking and yes! the "why me" question better best be avoided. The question you should be asking is "why the hell not?"


Just be in the present. Life takes care of itself. Worrying about the future doesn't help. Thinking about the past never has. So live this moment. It is not going to come back. The more you take responsibility for your past and present, the more you are able to create the future you seek.


Most important of all is, Learn. Always choose to expand rather than contract after every problem that you come across. Some times it may not be the most appreciated option by one self, but then it sure is the best way. 


Life for me has no place for destiny, fate and things like that. I believe in choices. Choices that we make. So many times I've been asked why am I like this? Well, I am like this :) And I totally love for whatever there is :P

Commitment - A function of Need ?

Reading a blog by a friend of mine it occurred to me that he had forgotten one word in the group of words for which he prayed to God for support and courage and solution. Nevertheless, he got none. Because he has managed to jinx The Almighty.


Okay, probably this one word seems to be the most confusing of the group of words that my friend tried to enlighten. So I go by his style.




Main entry – commit
Part of speech – verb
Definition – to perform an action
Synonyms - accomplish, achieve, act


Main entry- Commitment
Part of speech- noun
Definition – assurance, obligation
Synonyms - charge, duty, engagement, guarantee, liability, must, need, ought, pledge, promise, responsibility, undertaking, vow, word


Sentence usage - Personal commitment is an assuring interaction dominated by obligations. These obligations may be mutual, or self-imposed, or explicitly stated, or may not.


Something which literally means to show loyalty, duty or pledge to something or someone, should not have had so many synonyms. Ah well, isn’t this is the most important thing in a relationship after love and trust. So how can such an important factor ‘commitment’ be related to the words ‘duty’, ‘liability’, ‘need’, ‘promise’, ‘responsibility’, ‘vow’, et cetera.


Well all these words can be found athttp://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/commitment I rather not listen to what my heart says. I had to refer to the website for the ‘actual’ meaning. Not what pipette feels or burette (our aliases) feels. This word is something which we all perceive differently.


Now the synonyms say a lot about the word itself. A few feel it is my ‘responsibility’ to be true to my partner. A few feel ‘I need to’ be with my partner. These are but self-imposed. By the time, people start knowing each other inside out, the commitment which was duty and need generally becomes a duty and a function of need. Well haven’t we all said this “If need be I can do this and that”. How is it that when we start off a relationship that we feel much more secure than what we are after a little time into the relationship? Maybe the fact that we have to work on it is the factor. Nothing comes easy.


If commitment actually had all of the above synonyms, did we ever stop for a second before asking for a commitment? Or did we also think, commitment will come with time, depending on the way the relationship holds on? Is that a function of need? Why do we end a relationship if it’s not bad? People change over time. But more than the people themselves, their needs change. And the mathematical function goes awry. Those who hold on, get through. Those who don’t, they had the wrong formulae all this while.


All of us reading this probably know the words, but haven’t ever tried to link these. So just thought of doing that, as referred to the word ‘commitment’.


Charge = burden
Duty = responsibility
Responsibility = accountability (Accountability = blameworthiness)
Engagement = pledge to marry (Guarantee = pledge)
Liability = responsibility
Must = necessity
Need = want, requirement


Now, is that what commitment actually means to us? Why couldn’t commitment have a synonym ‘trust’? Probably the two can never come together.


Main entry – Trust
Part of speech- noun
Definition – believe in something as true, trustworthy
Synonyms - assurance, certainty, certitude, confidence, conviction, credence, credit, dependence, entrustment, expectation, faith, gospel truth, hope, reliance


I am confused. Some define ‘commitment’ as the base of their relationships. No wonder, so many fail. Stark contrast between the noun and the verb! Really don’t know what to define ‘commitment’ as? Maybe some day, I would be ready to commit when I feel commitment is just trust. What about you?